For the first time in 20 years, someone has mentioned The Knack outside of the context of one of those sleazy “Best of the [decade]” CDs past-their-prime celebrities sell on late night TV.

No, the authors of “My Sharona” and nothing else haven’t gone and done something crazy like, say, writing a new song - they’re doing what all the has-beens seem to do these days and filing a lawsuit.

No doubt being hard pressed to find someone to sue, what on account of having no presence in the public mind for the better part of the last two decades, they have filed suit against pioneering hip-hop group (do we really even need to say pioneering? Everybody knows that) Run DMC for sampling “My Sharona” in the perennial classic “It’s Tricky”.

Here’s some specifics from MTV News

The filing — which also names Rick Rubin (who produced the cut for 1986’s Raising Hell), Arista Records, Rush Groove Music, Rush Communications, online music retailers Yahoo, Amazon, Napster, iTunes and others as defendants — claims that Run-DMC engaged in the “unauthorized copying, reproduction and distribution of [the Knack’s] musical composition and improperly [profiting from]” use of the sample, which the suit claims was “willfully, or with reckless disregard, unlawfully appropriated.”

We have hypothesized an interaction between Doug Feiger/Berton Averre of The Knack and the surviving members of Run DMC, which will now follow:

The Knack: Pardon me kind sirs, but it appears that you sampled our song in 1986. Could we please have some fucking money?

Run DMC: But that song has been a legend in its own right for the last 20 years, and probably turned people on to buying your crappy albums in the first place.

The Knack: The title of the song is My Sharona, not Thy Sharona.

We’re certainly hoping that if anything, this overly litigious behavior on the part of morons Feiger and Averre (oh come on, none of them ever used the stage name “Nick Knack”?) will point out the ridiculousness of the way current copyright laws function with respect to derivative works. If Run DMC had been unable to release that track - or many of their other tracks that emply samples - at the outset, it’s possible that an entire genre of music’s shift into the mainstream could have been dramatically slowed or stymied.

The reason that The Knack didn’t sue in 1986? Oh, this one is truly priceless.

Despite the popularity of the riff, some may wonder why Fieger and Averre waited two decades to take action against the hip-hop icons. The lawsuit claims the pair never heard the DMC classic before 2005.
Despite the popularity of the riff, some may wonder why Fieger and Averre waited two decades to take action against the hip-hop icons. The lawsuit claims the pair never heard the DMC classic before 2005.

Never heard that song? This gives us the distinct impression that Fieger and Averre talk in the Richard Pryor “white guy” voice, and say things like “rap…, more like c-rap!”

In all seriousness, though, we’re hoping a judge will throw this one out on account of the contradictory nature of the charges - first look here:

The document asserts that, because of Run-DMC’s sampling of “My Sharona,” Fieger and Averre have “suffered actual damages, including lost profits, lost opportunities, loss of goodwill, lost publicity, attorneys’ fees and interest.” The suit seeks unspecified damages and related legal fees, and characterizes the “signature” riff sampled in “It’s Tricky” as “the essence” of the song.

Then go here:

“That [riff] is not only the essence of ‘My Sharona,’ it is one of the most recognizable sounds in rock and roll,” said Fieger through his lawyers.

So, if it’s one of the most ‘recognizable sounds in rock and roll’, what possible profits, opportunities, or publicity could the band have lost? Everyone already knew the damned song anyway.

This contradiction is a bit remniscent of Jerry Falwell’s admission that no one would ever actually believe that he did his mother in an outhouse, while at the same time trying to prove that Larry Flynt’s joke-ad about it in Hustler couldn’t be construed as a parody. Hopefully this faulty logic finds The Knack releasing that long-ago played out one hit wonder on another compilation instead of trying to squeeze money out of visionary artists like Run DMC.